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Summer has been, on the whole, a success. And it ain't over yet. Auditions are soon for HSC and HGO Children's Chorus, and if I make either of them I'll be plenty happy. On the other hand, I had self-imposed homework that is nowhere near finished. The libretto is entirely put down,though it has yet to be hacked to pieces by the teacher so it will fit into the thirty minutes allowed it by the Madrigal Dinner, and most of the music has yet to be written. I really want to hurry up and write it and have it be wonderful lbefore they can offer to help me and have it be not all mine, but partly theirs, and have the credit for all of it not go to me. I feel like I ought to write the whole thing, just so I can get all the credit for it. What a stupid reason. Go look at it, if anybody's looking, at http://elfwood.lysator.liu.se/libr/s/a/sanura2/starbirds.html .
I feel like such a dork. I haven't practiced cello seriously in about a full year, or maybe a year and a half, and I'm expecting to try to get in the orchestra or a chamber group next year at one of the most selective schools in town. If I make it, great. I'll be last chair. This is entirely my fault, because I have not done anything to prevent losing my skill, but it makes me feel inadequate and worthless all the same. If I don't make it, even worse.
Then there's the honor problem. I can just see myself, head down and barely speaking, all year long, no fun at all. I really lost it right then. I'll be living in the shadow of my transgression all my life, I'm sure. I'll never forget it, I'm not worthy of the trust they give me, and I have as little self-control as you can scrape by with. Just look at my figure.
Still, I guess it's not so bad. He'll be there, hopefully clueless as an armadillo. Very decorative, he is. Oh, piffle. I'm really not going to get anywhere, so why do I even bother?
I feel like such a dork. I haven't practiced cello seriously in about a full year, or maybe a year and a half, and I'm expecting to try to get in the orchestra or a chamber group next year at one of the most selective schools in town. If I make it, great. I'll be last chair. This is entirely my fault, because I have not done anything to prevent losing my skill, but it makes me feel inadequate and worthless all the same. If I don't make it, even worse.
Then there's the honor problem. I can just see myself, head down and barely speaking, all year long, no fun at all. I really lost it right then. I'll be living in the shadow of my transgression all my life, I'm sure. I'll never forget it, I'm not worthy of the trust they give me, and I have as little self-control as you can scrape by with. Just look at my figure.
Still, I guess it's not so bad. He'll be there, hopefully clueless as an armadillo. Very decorative, he is. Oh, piffle. I'm really not going to get anywhere, so why do I even bother?