(no subject)

[sanura]

I just remembered what I dreamed last night. I was at a funeral in what looked like a palatial gym, hardwood floors and bleachers and all. I couldn't tell what age I was, but it didn't seem to be important. I was terribly upset. I went forward to the casket; it was cubical, and the body was arranged in a much more natural, curled-up-to-sleep position than one ever sees in a hands-folded coffin. I recognized him immediately. It was my dad, contrary to waking knowledge that he'd been burned beyond recognition. He looked asleep at first, but then I noticed the greenish tinge to his skin and the unnatural stillness. I was bawling miserably. Nothing seemed to change, and I don't remember if the body in the casket actually came to life, disembalmed and stood up, but suddenly he was alive and hugging me, and I was hugging him back, and he didn't let go. Everyone at the funeral cried and rejoiced and gave him what, in this dream, appeared to be a ceremonial set of words that one cries at a resurrection, different for each individual but terribly meaningful between the recently late and the funeral attendee. Everyone was crying to him, and he responded hearfeltly, but he didn't let me go, and I cried my "Into You" into his chest at the sappiest level of sincerity I've ever seen in a dream. I have no idea what I meant by it, since he died when I was three years old and I don't remember any in-jokes or private phrases we might have had, but it made sense at the time. It seemed like I knew him, and he knew me, despite his having been dead for however long I'd been alive at that point. I was awfully upset when I woke up. I never have dreams about my dad. My mom has had a couple, but I never dream about him.


While I was home for lunch the doorbell rang, and it was a scruffy-looking guy who talked to mama as I left. He's still here, so apparently she hired him to do the lawn and move the leaves out of the storm drain. I talked to him a little as I came up the driveway, and he asked me if I went to Rice and what was my major and when would he hear me sing a song. Maybe I'll go sing him a song.

Comments

[rachmaninof.livejournal.com]

i'm hugging you tomorrow.